CharityFocus.org: Incubator of Compassionate Action

Last Week's Twitter Links

Bhoutik Mehta — Sun, 25 Jul 2010 00:19:36 -0700

Below are last week's Tweets for CharityFocus. Spread the good!

Last Week's Twitter Links [more]

RT @daily_good The Business of Giving [more]

Conversation with a homeless drug addict who lived on the streets of SF for 27 years -- and finally found freedom in art: [more]

Recently met with Stephanie, who runs a really cool project of everyday stories. Pen Tales: [more]

A nonviolent resistance movement led by women could be a game-changer for the Israeli-Palestinian conflict: [more]

Nipun shares: Just spoke in Calgary, where few hundred more people are now rockin' to the CF beat. After the talk, people picked up 2000 Smile Cards, Decks, works & conversations, Meditation handbooks, GOP DVD's, you name it. There was no donation box, but organically people created a donation box and left $250 ($30 in coins!) ... and not a single other item was left. Lots of ripples, as many people are ready Karma Kitchen here too. After a bit, I went to lunch with my wonderful hosts -- and we tagged another table by paying for their tab. The waitress was stunned (and then rocked); all of us were moved. Every moment is an opportunity of service.

In 50's, how many teens felt like an "important person"? 12%. In 80s, it jumped to 80%. Narcissism Epidemic: [more]

RT @daily_good Storytelling Unleashes its Power [more]

Quote, from where I'm staying in Calgary: Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning how to dance in the rain.

Digital drugs?!? Kids are getting high on the internet, thanks to MP3s that induce a state of ecstasy: [more]

10 years ago, Jay Shafer downsized to an 89 sq ft house & reinvented both his lifestyle & career in the process: [more]

Oprah Winfrey's message to Harvard students: "Find your purpose, it's about service." An intriguing case study... [more]

Recent photo of two legends of service, Jayesh Patel & his father, Ishwar Patel: [more] Walk w/Jayesh-bhai: [more]

10 ways for parents to scientifically improve happiness [more]

"Tweet less, kiss more." Do we skilfully use technology for human purposes or are we controlled by it?

Charities are often told they should learn from business. The reverse is also true. Economist: [more]

Surprising insights about creativity: [more]

HelpOthers: The Journey of a Spanish Smile Card [more]

RT @daily_good 365 Days of Happiness [more]

guri shares: This Sunday I volunteered at Karma Kitchen Berkeley after quite a long time. It's beautiful to see the infectious spirit-of-service carried onwards by so many new faces I haven't seen before ... as well as the older volunteers like Tom and Richard who held it all together. The ecosystem is broadening and the sense of community that KK creates each week seems very powerful, especially in the West.

Pavi shares: Found this in my notes today: (From a 2006 interview with Prez Kalam for the Arvaind book)Ancient thought from Pico della Mirandola's Oration on The Dignity of Man (yes he'd actually brought this to the interview with him!) "We have made thee neither of heaven nor earth, neither mortal nor immortal. So that with freedom of choice and with honor, as though the maker and molder of thyself, thou mayest fashion thyself in whatever shape thou shalt prefer. Thou shalt have the power to degenerate into the lower forms of life, which are brutish. Thou shalt have the power out of thy soul's judgment, to be reborn into the higher forms, which are divine.� An elegant, powerful reminder of choice. (Today) [more]

RT @daily_good The Ripple Effect of Kindness [more]

Birju shares: Creativity / insight isn't necessarily a 'stroke of light' that just hits you. I had a former business school professor mention that insight comes from applying common knowledge in one field to another field where it is unknown. This is why having a broad base is valuable, as there's more to apply from. An example of this is CF itself, as gift econ is not really a biz concept and so folks in that space find it insightful. :)

Tom shares: As I begin winding down my full-time year with CF, I'm documenting how I do Karma Kitchen coordination and other things, like finances. It's interesting seeing how, once a blueprint is made, there's no reason why so many CF projects can't take off all over the world (and if Karma Kitchen is any indicator, I think they will!)

For two weeks, @DeepakChopra took the vows of monk, shaved his head and walked with a begging bowl in Thailand: [more]

Wonderful advice from a four-year-old on how to paint and draw: [more]

Neil shares: Just learned about the remarkable story of Barbados. A Caribbean island comparable in terms of history and resources to Jamaica 40 years ago, now has twice the median income of Jamaica, is thriving economically, and has over 95% literacy while Jamaica remains poor and lacking in education. The difference? Years ago Barbadian economy had financial crisis, and country's leadership made a decision against status quo historically by exercising monetary restraint and asking its population to spend less. Labor leadership stepped up and asked people to accept massive wage cuts under slogan "Save Barbados". Business leadership recognized labor's patriotic sacrifice and decided to accept a lower profit margin. Through mutual trust and solidarity between government, business, and people later formalized as the "Social Partnership", the country came out of crisis and real wages are now higher than before cut. And Barbadians are actually happy with their political leaders! [more]

Neil shares: Reflecting on this week's thought on status quo and leadership (http://bit.ly/a68fdL): Our internal status quo becomes apparent during meditation. The mind is so noisy, so chaotic. The status quo is to entertain any thought. The status quo is to disengage with the present moment, to roll in the past or roll in the future. The status quo is inattention. The status quo is to react to temporary discomfort. To go against the internal status quo is to keep the mind still, to not identify with temporary sensations, to experience them with greater awareness and patience than you thought possible. Going against internal status quo is discovering new vistas of personal strength and capability. That is self-leadership.

Held a fantastic #KarmaKitchen call with coordinators from Berkeley, DC, Chicago and soon-to-be locations of NY, Calgary, and London!

Liked the Show? Maybe It Was the Commercials: [more] ... interruptions can make an experience better.

Yuka just introduced CF to Alan Briskin, whose latest book is on Collective Wisdom: [more]

RT @daily_good Entrepreneur of Small Things [more]

RT @fatknowledge Best predictor of passenger catching a flight he booked: he had ordered a vegetarian meal! Economist: [more]

Wikipedia excelled where Facebook seems to have failed, customer satisfaction: [more]

Just reminded of Anne Scott's work at DreamWeather Foundation, honoring the divine feminine: [more]

Stanford researcher @bjfogg offers a grid for "15 Ways that Behavior Can Change": [more]

HelpOthers: A Circle of Kindness Started by a 10 Year Old Girl [more]

RT @daily_good 10 Pieces of Wisdom for Painters [more]

There's nowhere to turn but within to find what really matters & discover you already have enough. [more]

The opposite of apathy is presence. --Somik, @ last Wednesday's circle of sharing

Richard shares: It happened in a split second. I was on my bicycle and quickly approaching an older man walking toward me. Just as I was about to pass him by I looked into his face. He was looking directly at me with a startling smile, very bright and unexpected. We passed quite close to each other. In an instant I was past him, but charged with a sudden happiness. I even wanted to go back and thank him. Have to admit that I didn't, but funny how powerful such a moment can be.

RT @msquihuis The secret of being more creative, productive, effective? Do less. [more]

Annie Leonard explores the toxins in our bathrooms, and what to do about them. Story of Cosmetics: [more]

RT @trishnashah What would it look like to move from "more, bigger, faster" to "richer, deeper and more satisfying?" [more]

RT @daily_good A Message in a Wallet [more]

Offering compassion to others can bring peace within - this is your brain on compassion meditation: [more]

Anish and Cherri were on a local radio station, talking about Chicago's #KarmaKitchen experience: [more]

Researchers are tracking the nation's happiness by analyzing tweets! What does the mood map reveal? [more]

Scientific research is showing that we are born with an innate moral sense. [more]

HelpOthers: How I Like To Use My Smile Cards... [more]

Guri has started to blog her experiences from 900-km walking pilgrimage, The Camino De Santiago: [more]

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Grandma Asks: What Can I Give?

Nipun Mehta — Sun, 25 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0700

One of my friends went up to a woman at a gas station and handed her a twenty. "This is for your gas. Please pay it forward." The woman bluntly refused the money.

Most everyone wants to be kind, but finding the right opportunity can be daunting task. So much so that some people give up on kind acts all-together. Knowing that challenge, some kindness "experts" step it up -- they create opportunities for others to be kind.

Recently, in India, Jayesh Patel and I visited my grandmother's sister. We call her 'masi'. Though she's a widow in her 80s, living alone in poor health conditions, and confined to her home for the whole day, she manages to be quite content.

At one point in our conversation, she asks, "I want to practice kindess too. But what could I possibly do?"

Without skipping a beat, Jayesh-bhai says: "How 'bout you grow Tulsi plants, give them a name, bless them with your kind wishes and everyday, call up one family from your local community and gift them a plant?" Tulsi (Holy Basil) is highly revered in India, considered to be one of the few plants that emit oxygen at night, and is a gift everyone is happy to accept. :) And such an offering would also give a fantastic opportunity for Masi to be connected with the locals, many of whom she has known for decades! Seeing Masi's excitement, Jayesh-bhai adds: "I'll come back in couple weeks with 25 potted plants, then!"

As our conversation proceeds, the generosity vibe ripples deeper into our hearts. "Ultimately, we can give no matter what our conditions," we all seemed to be saying. Just then, another idea pops up. "Masi, you watch so many spiritual TV shows and read all these inspiring books. You should write down quotes that you think are especially memorable, and gift those hand-written quotes to everyone that visits. Everyone who will visit you will leave with a gift." With as much enthusiasm as an 80-something can muster, she stands up and hobbles to a cupboard behind the sofa. "You know, for years, I have been saving these cuttings from newspapers. It never occured to me that I give them away!"

In a very grandmotherly way, she opens the lid of that box and starts leafing through the little tidbits of wisdom. Some very entire articles, some just quotes. After reading some of them aloud, she concludes, "Let me just start giving them right now." She gives one to a neighbor, who happened to visiting right then, and another folded sheet to Guri.

Guri's quote -- in Gujarati font, with white ink, on neatly wrinkled, red, newspaper-thin sheet of paper: "Dear God, with your grace, I have received all that I have. It is already all yours, yet I offer it to you again, because it is only through offering that I can receive it."

In two weeks, while Masi kept up her quote-giving drive, Jayesh-bhai returned with 25 potted Tulsi plants. Masi was in tears, for she had found an opportunity to give.

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The Ripple Effect of Kindness

Birju Pandya — Sat, 17 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0700

Over the last few years, I've become a big proponent of Smile Cards. The premise behind these small cards is simple: do an anonymous act of kindness and leave a card behind, inviting the recipient to pay-it-forward. If he/she does, the chain keeps going, resulting in "ripples" of kindness radiating out.

Smile Cards are wonderful in ways I cannot count. Small, simple, humble -- yet powerful, because one act of kindness can be the start of a long chain. But for all these reasons, the main reason why I use them is the subtle change that has begun to occur in the way I think.

Recently, I was on a plane reading an intriguing financial book my friend had given me.

As our flight landed I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was an elderly gentleman asking for my thoughts on the book. Turned out he had heard about it and was curious to read it. I gave him my feedback on the interesting read, but then a thought crossed my mind: why not just give it to him? At the time the book wasn't even available in the U.S. So I handed it over. Of course, he initially refused, but I made my best case, and after a bit of back and forth, the man accepted the book with tears in his eyes. He told me he had a hard time understanding why I should do such a thing, but that he'd pay-it-forward somehow.

Now, in the grand scheme of things, this story means nothing. I mean, it's just giving a book to someone. Anybody can do it. But... that thought, the "why not just give him the book?" thought, was very new to me. For the few months prior, I had been walking around with Smile Cards in my wallet. What initially started as a nice conversation piece at parties turned into a pile of kind acts that I just had to unload.

Slowly, my perspective started shifting. Instead of looking at how I could manipulate situations to my benefit, my mind was busy trying to think of ways I could make someone's day better. The cards were a pocket-sized prompt to be a better person! I began to realize that what I was carrying wasn't just some nice cards -- I was carrying the potential for generosity in every interaction. All this leads me back to the day I handed the book over to the stranger. It was amazing exactly because it was ordinary. I had experienced a moment where I wanted to give out of habit; almost as if that was the only way I knew how to respond to the situation. For that moment, there was no difference between a stranger and a trusted friend. And the most beautiful part? After I handed him the book, the person jumping around and giddy for the rest of the day was -- me.

I realize now that I've been literally rewiring my brain, that the consistent effort to do little things for others is what leads to making the larger acts of giving 'no-brainers.' What's more, this has led to a shift in perspective from being focused on results to being focused on the process. Don't expect the world to change, just give right now with no strings attached, and trust that the power of the act will continue the re-wiring process in everyone involved.

I've seen in my life how the ripple effect leads to changes both externally and internally. While I don't necessarily need the Smile Cards to continue on the path, they sure are a great excuse :)

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Opening Day at Karma Kitchen Chicago!

Anish Parikh — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0700

After approximately 1 year of planning, preparing, and putting forth full efforts to bring Karma Kitchen to the great city of Chicago, the time has finally come! On Sunday, July 11, 2010, Karma Kitchen Chicago opened its doors in collaboration with Klay Oven Restaurant located in the River North area of the Windy City.

Prior to the launch, the Karma Kitchen team held a volunteer orientation at the restaurant. The majority of the volunteers had never even experienced a Karma Kitchen before, but as the orientation came to an end, it was apparent that the synergies began to manifest themselves and that the Karma Kitchen concepts were coming to light. Although a Karma Kitchen opening day is slightly different from the opening day for a baseball team, the team still had the same goal: to make sure we hit it out of the park for all of our guests!

On launch day, as the team met that morning, the energies were high and the excitement obvious. One amazing thing after another was set in motion. Seeing the amazing work product of the committees and what they were able to accomplish in just a few days was astounding. Within the first 30 minutes of opening our doors, the entire restaurant was almost filled. The hosts up front held their own with the swarm of guests coming in, some knowing about Karma Kitchen, others hearing about it for the first time. The servers were running all over the place, but gracefully juggling all of their tables and helping to ensure that their guests were having a positive experience. One gentleman commented about the professionalism of the team and the manner in which Karma Kitchen was run. Others spoke to the underlying ideals surrounding the gift economy and the experiment in generosity. Finally, some of the guests were surprised by the fact that the volunteers had their own professions and were doing this without any expectation of receiving something in return.

During the first two hours of Karma Kitchen, the volunteers demonstrated that when everyone is volunteering for the same reason and when that reason stems from wanting to push their own generosity to the limit, amazing things can happen! Special kudos to the Outreach Team who did such a great job of spreading the word about our launch. Fearing that the World Cup would prevent people from coming in, the Outreach Team even turned this into a positive message: "Come to Karma Kitchen and then go to Watch the World Cup!"

Another kudos to the Ambiance Team who did an amazing job of transforming Klay Oven into Karma Kitchen. Complete with the KK experience were menus, note pads on each table with a greeting message to the guests, laminated quote sheets on each table, signs, kindness table decorations, and more. The restaurant looked great! One of the volunteers put together a playlist of local Chicago artists to play during Karma Kitchen hours (one artist actually came as a guest and was thrilled to hear his music playing across the restaurant)!

Though we learned a lot about the process and came out with a few things to change for next time, perhaps the most valuable lesson came in the form of a deeper understanding of ourselves and giving without expectation. Although success is defined in many different ways, we know that our opening day was a success because we served over 100 guests, created a unique community experience, and approached the day wholeheartedly with a smile.

The Karma Kitchen Chicago team would like to give a BIG shout-out to Karma Kitchen Berkeley and Karma Kitchen DC for their utmost support, assistance. This all would not have been possible without them! As one volunteer so eloquently put it, "We carried KK Berkeley and KK DC with us with every plate that we served."

Needless to say, the Karma Kitchen Chicago team truly hit it out of the park on opening day!

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Why I Volunteer With KarmaTube

Birju Pandya — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0700

Volunteering with CharityFocus in any capacity is an opportunity and an invitation. CharityFocus provides the space from which one can more easily serve with ‘no strings attached.’ For many (myself included), it’s quite rare to do something with an intention of no strings attached, so being intrigued by this idea I’ve been volunteering with KarmaTube (a project of CharityFocus) for the last few years.

Interestingly, while my intention wasn’t to receive anything in return for my involvement, I’ve found that much has come my way! As a way to describe what can happen when results are not explicitly sought, here are the 5 most salient ‘benefits’ from volunteering with Karmatube:

Knowing about the video content – Over the course of the last few years, KarmaTube volunteers have scouted and watched hundreds upon hundreds of inspiring videos. This creates a connection to the content, especially when few others are aware of it. Consequently, when I’m in a conversation about why my friend is unhappy at her job, I can easily reference and send some of the site content on positive psychology.

Shifting in mindset from watching video content – Interestingly, it is difficult to watch so many videos of people doing inspirational work without starting to feel it to be normal. One starts to reorient the internal compass so that doing activities to help others is ‘default mode.’ This is ‘neuroplasticity,’ the brain actively rewiring itself based on the stimulus it receives. Consequently, we start trying to learn from these activities and try them in our own daily life.

Expanding kindness creativity – In addition to simply watching and curating videos, KarmaTube volunteers also write actions (be-the-change’s or BTC’s) that the viewer can take if they are moved by what was seen. From a volunteer perspective this is a huge opportunity to expand creativity in writing these BTC’s. How often do you spend thinking of creative and specific ways to serve others? As a KarmaTube volunteer, you do it explicitly at least a dozen times a week.

Focusing on process before results – Even though it just so happens that Karmatube viewership has grown like a weed, that was never the main intention. The goal is to be clearer in values, write more insightful and usable BTC’s, highlight more inspiring videos and let the chips fall where they may. This means videos that would generate a high viewership are sometimes not chosen because they don’t strongly capture the values of inspiration and service.

Supporting a team on the same journey – As Karmatube is entirely volunteer run, EVERYONE involved is at some level receiving all of these benefits. The goal here is to be-the-change ourselves, which is quite different than volunteering for a fundraising gala where money is raised but moment-to-moment behavior isn’t shifted. Since that is so explicit, the team supports each other on this humble path and we instantly have a group of ‘noble friends.’

While this certainly isn’t an exhaustive list, it sheds light on much of what I’ve seen in the volunteer experience. What’s more, as this activity can be done heavily on a laptop, the only thing I end up ‘missing’ is the occasional Seinfeld rerun as I’d rather be writing up videos anyway.

I am tremendously grateful for the opportunity to serve in this capacity as it is slowly changing me for the better. Would love to read about what activities have changed you for the better in the comments.

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Karma Kitchen Pilot Launches in Chicago

Viral Mehta — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0700

The folks out in Chi-town have done it -- for quite some time they have been planning a Karma Kitchen in the Windy City, and tomorrow, they launch their pilot. Every second Sunday of the month, for July, August and September, volunteers will take over Klay Oven Restaurant in Chicago and serve guests the gift of a meal. Of course, the meal is an excuse -- the whole idea is to create an entire experience of generosity, inviting guests to pay-forward the gift. In keeping this chain going, both guests and volunteers help to create a future that moves from transaction to trust, from self-oriented isolation to shared commitment and from fear of scarcity to celebration of abundance.

When: 2nd Sundays of July, August, September, Noon to 3

Where: Klay Oven Restaurant, 414 N. Orleans Street, Chicago, IL, 312-527-3999

And this is no ordinary group that has come together! Check out their super-well-made video, courtesy of KK Chicago'er Dave Chung:

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Cultivating Patience: Five Practical Tools

Viral Mehta — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 04:00:00 -0700

A recent reflection:

Patience is one of those qualities that doesn’t get much consideration -- especially in our fast-paced 21st century. But there is tremendous wisdom in it. Patience is what helps us let go of an unhelpful obsession with outcomes and with our limited identities. It is a recognition that our reality is in flux and we don't always know what is best. Practiced deeply, patience is what dissolves unexamined reactions and habits of interpretation, allowing us to see things in a way that is more real, more whole, more true. With patience the unknown doesn't frustrate us, and our fundamental questions create a positive sense of wonder and a platform for possibilities. But the trouble with patience is that it usually comes too little, too late. We’ve already yelled at a loved one, or thrown away months of work in despair. So how do we develop patience before we actually need it? Five tools to experiment with:

1. Zoom Out: First, identify what your mind is focused on, and then make an explicit effort to think more broadly and more long-term. Say someone cuts you off on the road; zooming out is to see that being cut off is not going to have a real impact in your life, and an hour from now, it will seem really insignificant. This practice is rooted in knowing that our view in a given moment can always expand, allowing us to see the same things in different ways. A key aspect of zooming out is knowing that we are not just what our reaction is at any instant -- helping broaden our identity. Impatience strikes when we become fixated on our own initial views, and zooming out allows us to consciously take a step out of our selves. If we were to hit the reset button on our habitual thinking, how would we see the situation?

2. Reconnect and Release: Take a deep breath, feel exactly what is going on in your chest, your throat, your stomach, your face, or anywhere else your mind naturally goes, and let go of any tension. Sometimes we lose our patience without any warning because we aren’t as aware of what’s been happening beneath the surface -- stress builds up at relatively unconscious levels of the mind. To prevent this accretion, the first step is to become aware of what is happening at the subtler levels of the mind, and a wonderful gateway for this is the body. As we sharpen our awareness, we begin to notice the physical components of mental tension, and just in shedding light on it, there’s a subtle but significant release. While sitting, we might feel it as a tightness in the hips or in shoulders scrunched high; while working, we might notice it in a tensed stomach or in a furrowed brow. Reconnecting and releasing is to work at the root of impatience, and to consciously dissolve the resistances we discover.

3. Zoom In: Zoom in fully to the present moment without judgment. Flood your awareness with refined details from all of your senses, without getting fixated on any of them in particular. The more incisive and objective our attention, the more it becomes a gateway to realizing the potential richness and beauty inherent in every experience. We can even tune into this kind of depth in our most difficult times -- entering into the moment, instead of escaping from it. And this works most powerfully when we combine it with the previous tool, zooming in to what we are feeling somewhere in the body, increasingly sensitizing our minds to this deeper level of awareness. As we become more adept at this, then even in being challenged by an emotion, a part of our mind turns inward to the body and zooms in, and we come back to balance quickly.

4. Catch the Small Stuff -- Be attentive even when it doesn’t seem to matter -- when you’re shopping, driving or at work. “Small” things are happening all the time, making the practice easily accessible. Starting off small makes it unintimidating and doable; but more importantly, working at the level of “small” allows us to sharpen our awareness. So we start with becoming aware of the slightest ways in which we might be “off”: a subtle boredom while waiting in the grocery line, or a bit of impatience at the red light, or tuning out for a bit in a meeting. Each time we catch even a tiny deviation, we’re strengthening our attunement to the subtle, allowing us to dissolve little impatiences before they multiply. On the flip side, recognizing and strengthening small positive deviance -- moments of gratitude, joy or compassion -- allows us to strengthen those responses. Our awareness of such gifts is an acknowledgment of “having enough,” and is a perfect antidote to the “need more” mindset inherent in impatience.

5. Tune in to Change: Become aware of something that is changing -- anything. Start from noticing things changing outside, but then connect to what is arising and passing within. Impatience feeds off of fixation, and any time we connect to the changing nature of reality, we break that tendency to get stuck to any one view. Rationally, we know that everything changes. But when we allow ourselves to actually notice it -- “this person is upset now, but that’s not how s/he always is” – we break the internal “story” we tend to create. Intellectually recognizing change in this way is a start; it has the deepest impact when it becomes experiential. Our own feeling of impatience itself has variance, as does every thought and bodily sensation. And the more we tune in to this changing reality, the more easily we can engage with what is actually emerging.

In learning to use any set of tools, repeated use and exploration yields progress. As we learn to zoom out, we stop identifying with the immediacy of situations, and with constrained views. We then continue to work in small ways to realign ourselves, reconnect to the body and dissolve tension, zoom in deeply into the present, and tune in to our emerging reality. Of course, unenlightened moments will continue to be a part of the game. But with the humility of that acceptance, we continue to push the boundaries of our awareness and develop our ability to rest comfortably in the present moment. Patience, then, is a kind withholding of judgment and also of conclusion, a valiant invitation for our evolution to unfold just as it should.

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More: An in-depth exploration of patience, and a poetic passage, "A Portrait in Patience"

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The 8 Levels of Service

Pavi Mehta — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 00:00:00 -0700

Maimonides, often called by his acronym RaMBaM (Rabbi Moshe Ben Maimon), was a 12th century Jewish scholar and physician. Rambam wrote a code of Jewish law, the Mishnah Torah, based on the Rabbinic oral tradition.

Rambam organized the different levels of tzedakah (charity/service) into a list from the least to the most honorable:

8. When donations are given grudgingly.

7. When one gives less than he should, but does so cheerfully.

6. When one gives directly to the poor upon being asked.

5. When one gives directly to the poor without being asked.

4. When the recipient is aware of the donor's identity, but the donor does not know the identity of the recipient.

3. When the donor is aware of the recipient's identity, but the recipient is unaware of the source.

2. When the donor and recipient are unknown to each other.

1. The highest form of charity is to help sustain a person before they become impoverished by offering a substantial gift in a dignified manner, or by extending a suitable loan, or by helping them find employment or establish themselves in business so as to make it unnecessary for them to become dependent on others.

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Reflections on the "Pay What You Can" Model

Birju Pandya — Sun, 04 Jul 2010 00:35:00 -0700

Came across an interesting perspective in a Salon article on Pay What You Can Restaurants, in which an economist tries to explain why allowing customers to decide their own prices is a bad idea. Also of interest to note that I've yet to see any economist refer to any internal shift that happens from truly connecting with another. Our friend Rahul Brown shared some reflections on another forum, which I thought were great:

A few years ago when we were trying to launch InSPIRE's young professional program, we decided to go with 'pay what you want' model instead of gift-economy. Since we were all volunteers, program expenses equate to actual costs, and so we were trying to boldly communicate our spirit while at the same time hedge on the risk of lacking the funds to make the program happen. The overall lesson I learned from the experiment is that 'pay what you want' (esp. for things people have never paid for before) can generate confusion, but can also be a doorway to clarity if dealt with patiently. Sub-lessons include:

Value is Arbitrary -- No two people value the same thing in the same way; no person values the same thing the same way in different circumstances; the preciousness of the same amount of money varies greatly with your present life circumstances and desires
Money Obscures Value -- People confuse money with value because of superficial relationships with both; paying for something at any price leads to the assumption that its 'paid-for' whereas in reality there is always some outstanding debt that ought to be both a reason for gratitude and an impetus to pay-forward some of what you've received
Gratitude and Freedom Generate the 'Highest Return' -- By allowing for the greatest thoughtfulness and flexibility, you generate precisely the right 'return' out of the confusion of how to value something; by generating non-monetary returns, you capture what would have been lost with a price tag; gratitude and freedom is liberating to both giver and receiver in both the present moment, and those who have given to the giver in the past as well as ones who will receive from the receiver in the future

While we suffered a bit, I am glad we tried 'pay what you want' and I think any such experiment when viewed objectively without uni-focus on financial bottom line would yield similar insights and thus be a 'success'. I hope to see a greater proliferation of people honestly attempting 'pay what you want' experiments, as I think they're a critical station along the journey or reorganizing our relationships with money and each other.

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Six Keys to Making Good Decisions

Somik Raha — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0700

On my first day in a class called "Decision Analysis" at Stanford, I was shocked when Prof. Ron Howard said that you couldn't judge a decision from the outcome. I walked up to him after class and said, "Professor, this is what I have read in spiritual texts - that we are only competent in the action, and the outcome is not in our hands. Your principle is ancient." Prof. Howard replied, "It may be, but these texts don't tell you how to apply this to financial decision-making, and we have worked out the details here." This little conversation ended up changing my life. Here was a field of thought right in the middle of the material world that espoused the deepest spiritual philosophy I'd ever come across. Suddenly, I could be consistent with my material decisions without compromising my spiritual ideals. I had to learn more. After trying most of the classes in the Masters program at Stanford, I decided to continue on a doctoral journey in this field.

Before going further, I must mention Prof. Howard's caveat, said in dramatic form, "Let it not be said that this is the best way to make decisions. For the monk who believes every outcome is the right outcome, there is no decision to be made. However, for our western society which likes to think we have some influence over outcomes, I have found no better way to think about it." I think this is not limited to western society at all - we all like to think that we have some influence over our outcomes. Isn't there a contradiction then between the spiritual and the material? We'll explore this further on.

After establishing the first principle that decisions cannot be judged from their outcomes, we learn that a decision can only be judged by "the light the decision-maker had when making the decision." In other words, we have to travel back in time to the point where the decision was being made, and look at all the information the decision-maker had. We have to then see how the decision process unfolded, by examining it in light of the six elements of decision quality, which can be applied by anyone in any decision situation:

Appropriate Framing: Think of the decision as similar to taking a photo. Was the decision "frame" too restrictive, or was it too broad to be useful? Did we make assumptions that we ought to have explicitly stated and challenged? Recognizing one's assumptions requires taking a step back. Most of the time, we narrow our frame too much and don't zoom out to see how much room there is. At other times, we are so overwhelmed by our lack of focus that we cannot recognize what our decision is. Developing an awareness of when to zoom in and zoom out is at the heart of arriving at the appropriate frame. When discussing our decision frame, it is extremely important not to be trapped by our own rhetoric, and so we have to try our best to use value-neutral language (language that does not evoke value-judgments). For instance, there is a big difference in our emotional reaction when using the word "pollution" over the more neutral "emission."
Creative Alternatives: Did we find ourselves restricted by the alternatives at hand, or did we make a sincere effort in coming up with creative alternatives? Most of the time, when we have a favored alternative, we jump straight in without reflection. Sometimes, we are so attached to our favorite alternative that we may even be manipulative in making sure it is chosen. Breaking our attachment and giving ourselves room to be creative is necessary in order to find out-of-the-box alternatives.
Clear Values: Did we think about the important sources of value? What is it that is fundamentally important to us? What is instrumental? Do we appreciate all the values that are important and how they relate to each other? Understanding what we want involves understanding ourselves. Did we slow down to reflect on what's important to us?
Useful Information: Did we try hard enough to resolve the most critical uncertainties in our decision situation? Or did we spend our time gathering useless information that would not help our decision-making? We live in the age of "information explosion" thanks to the internet, and can easily be overwhelmed by it. Instead of trying to get as much data as possible on anything and everything, we can direct our attention to the information that affects what we value the most. More fundamentally, it is important for the decision maker to recognize that information is a state of mind. There are no probabilities out there in the universe that can be discovered by plunging into a haystack of data. Probabilities are a measure of our beliefs about the universe, and they only exist in our head. This distinction helps keep us honest by avoiding misleading terms like "objective probability."
Sound Reasoning: Were we consistent with our values when using information to come up with the best alternative? Did we contradict our values? This is the only element of decision quality that can be considered "objective." Given all the same inputs, the process of decision analysis will give us the same answer every time. However, it is rare for two people to have the same inputs. Each individual has different values and different beliefs. Decisions therefore are necessarily subjective and so, if we take the decision-maker out of the decision, the notion of a decision becomes meaningless.
Commitment to Action: While we may do a great decision analysis, when it comes time for the rubber to hit the road, does the car stop? How committed are we as decision-makers to follow through on what we believe to be a good decision? Lack of commitment to action can render the best decision analysis useless.

In my own practice of this process, and in having brought this process to organizations, there are a few interesting principles that help us see how decision analysis bridges the material and the spiritual:

You can only judge your own decisions: a consequence of understanding decision analysis is in seeing the logical fallacy of being judgmental. Given the above elements, you can't possibly judge the quality of another person's decision, as it's too hard to get all this information. This is fascinating - without talking about spirituality, decision analysis brings to the fore the futility of judging other people.
The "Sunk Cost principle:" The past is gone - it ain't coming back. You cannot hold on to how much you've sunk in any calculations on coming out ahead in the future. This brilliant rule knocks out clinging to the past, and incorporates it in our mathematics. In our exams, when students include the sunk cost in their mathematical calculations, they get penalized for making a fundamental mistake! The principle is treated as matter-of-fact, without a second thought given to the huge implications on our lives, which is, as it should be. Why should we spend large chunks of our life regretting the past? The past matters for learning, not for accounting.
Testing our beliefs and values: what if we believed differently - would our decisions change? What if we valued differently - would our decisions change? Do we have to go through all of our values to make a decision? Which values are material to our decision-making (as in, if we change some of our preferences, would our decisions change)? This interaction with our own beliefs and values is invaluable, for it helps loosen our attachment to any one belief and helps create a space of reflection between us and our decisions. Only when we believe that we have done our best can we let go of all our attachments to the past and the future, and start to be present. When we are fully present, we are free to do our best, at this one instant of time. We are living more fully, more happily. The ultimate utility of Decision Analysis, in my mind, is to help develop detachment to outcomes and promote equanimity.
Distinguishing between small-d and big-d decisions: there are decisions and then there are Decisions. To borrow from Prof. Howard, for the small stuff (multi-billion dollar resource allocation decisions included), decision analysis is the best way we know of for making good decisions. Decision Analysis is a consequentialist philosophy, where we think about the consequences that matter and our influence over them. For the really "important" stuff, like relationships with other people, deciding to love someone, or changing one's fundamental beliefs about life, embarking on a spiritual journey, decision analysis (or consequentialism) is not the best way to think about decisions. This is because the outcome of such decisions is likely to be transformational. I will no longer be the same person with the same set of values, preferences and perspective. Consequentialism implies some continuity of values and preferences from the decision to the outcome.

Prof. Howard once told me that he never made the "important" decisions in his life. They just happened and he was open to possibilities - he was present. For important decisions, value-based decision making is a much better approach, which he teaches in a class on Ethics (some might know this as the "action-based" or "Kantian" approach). My own research is on bridging the gap between consequentialism and value-based thinking, answering the question, "How do we make sure that our decisions are aligned with our core values?"

The best part of it all is that it's easy: the six elements of decision quality don't require complex mental gymnastics. In fact, these methods can be used across the board for all decisions, ranging from the personal to the professional, and even for life-and-death medical decisions. In my own experience, in organizations that sincerely use Decision Analysis, there is a marked difference in the atmosphere - people are relaxed and dedicated to doing their best. And besides the immediate mundane gains, there are deep trains of spiritual wisdom in the practice of decision analysis, that are independent of any spiritual tradition. Decisions are universal, and decision analysis is an accessible method that for all practical purposes, bridges the gap between spiritual and material thinking.

Note: The Decision Education Foundation (DEF) is a non-profit organization started by Prof. Howard to bring this philosophy to high-school children. DEF has opened up its unique curriculum so teachers all over the world can learn and teach it.

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"The Path is Found in the Service of Others:" An Evening With David Gustave

Trishna Shah — Fri, 18 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0700

This past week, we had a very inspiring Wednesday gathering of twenty Londoners for a guest speaker Circle of Sharing with David Gustave, who candidly and honestly shared his incredible personal journey with us. It is very humbling to learn from and share a beautiful evening with someone whose life experiences are nothing short of extraordinary: from growing up in an abusive family, to being homeless as a teenager, to using his fists as a "tool of choice" for survival, to attending Oxford as a 32-year-old undergraduate student, and finally giving back by helping young people facing similar circumstances to his own and offering them positive experiences to turn their lives around. The quote that inspires Dave’s service journey: “The path is found in the service of others.”

In the spirit of service, Dave shared his journey with us openly and what a complex journey it has been over the past 43 years. Dave was born to immigrant parents, an Irish mother and St. Lucian father, and raised in Peckham (South London), living in a “disgusting single room flat with rats and mice” in a white working-class neighbourhood along with his two siblings. Due to his mixed background, Dave experienced a lot of racism growing up and recalled how he got beaten up on the first day of school as a kid. Not only did he face violence and aggression in school, but also at home where he was beaten by his alcoholic father since he was only 5 years old. Although he dealt with a challenging home life, Dave feels that, “The institutionalised racism and classism I faced was more oppressive than any physical hit I’ve taken.”

His childhood experiences led Dave to feel very excluded from mainstream society and he turned to violence and aggression himself at the very young age of 11. “I learned from a young age to be more violent than everyone around me and that’s how I survived,” says Dave in describing these early years of his life.

And not only did the violence manifest itself externally, he also was dealing with potentially even more intense internal violence, as he had what he described as “rages” or “electrical storms” in his mind, where he would lock himself up in a room and let loose. Dave shared, “According to studies, people from my socio-economic circumstances experience the same stress levels as soldiers returning from Afghanistan.” Because he felt his voice was repressed and he lacked access to any outlets to express himself intellectually, violence became his tool of choice for survival because it was the only thing that enabled him to create space around him and that’s all he knew.

Dave left home when he was only 15, unable to deal with the abuse he faced at home. He pursued a variety of means to support himself over the next several years, often including "illegal" ones, as he did what he knew – try to survive. At 19, he got married to someone and spent the next 10 years being abusive to his own wife, channelling his violence close to home. By the time he reached the age of 29, Dave had spent several years in a series of “dead-end jobs” and was violent towards himself. At 29, he met someone else, left his wife and moved in with her. She underwent a traumatic experience personally and Dave reacted in a very selfish way, getting very angry personally but showing no compassion for what she must be going through. He looked back at how he handled this life experience and had a moment of clarity – something was not right here. Why was he not feeling more compassion for her? Why was he not able to get past his own anger? This experience was a significant turning point in his life and led him to set out to change the course of his life.

At 31, Dave decided to go back to school and secretly enrolled in evening classes to prepare for his A-level exams (equivalent of last two years of high school). While he had discontinued his formal education early at 16, Dave was aware that he was very smart and could do what he put his mind to academically. This time, he didn’t tell anyone what he was up to when he went back to school – he just got on with it. One of his exam papers happened to be graded by an Oxford professor, who was impressed with what he read and invited Dave up to meet with him at Oxford. He encouraged Dave to apply to university and the next thing he knew, at the age of 32, Dave enrolled at Oxford as an undergraduate studying history. He went on to complete a Masters degree as well and won a variety of law scholarships upon completing his studies there.

Until his mid-30’s, Dave feels he was “running on empty” and was destroying himself. He decided to actively seek out ways to work on himself, ways to find peace. He studied the work of numerous philosophers and learned about different religions in his pursuit. During his last year at Oxford, Dave found himself reading Malcolm X’s autobiography and recalls being particularly inspired by the last chapter where he talks about how he "found peace." He spent more time reading about Islam and through intellectual exploration arrived at the decision to convert, as he was seeking a religion that offered him a framework for his personal journey and tools for self-discipline. But even this major life decision, he kept to himself. In some ways, he feels that this moment in his life was the beginning to his path of service.

After finishing up at Oxford, Dave tried out law school and concluded very quickly that it wasn’t for him. He recalled going to an interview for a law school place where they asked him how he defines success and he responded, “To have a wife and kids, a home with a garden, to be happy.” And as you can imagine, they were confused by his answer. But as Dave sees, it, when you’ve had the upbringing he has, all you want is a normal life, that’s what you strive for. Around this time, Dave met a woman named Camila Batmanghelidjh, who had founded a charity based in South London called Kids Company to provide practical, emotional and educational support to vulnerable inner-city children. She could see the potential Dave had to really reach the young people her organisation worked with and connect with them. So, Dave decided to work for Kids Company as an educational motivator, working with young kids from troubled backgrounds facing very similar circumstances to his own and this too, just a few minutes away from where he grew up.

Initially, for the first couple of years, Dave had a difficult time connecting with the young people at Kids Company – they didn’t like him and they abused him. And then, he realised, it was a reflection of his own inner turmoil. Through his work, Dave learned that his own journey was so intertwined in the young people’s journeys. The kindness he received along the way in his life is what enabled him to travel the path he did and he wanted to give unconditionally to these young people all the kindness he had received so that they may choose a positive path in life. “It’s cool to give something back,” says Dave and this is what he does everyday in his role, as he creates "the leaders of tomorrow."

Throughout his life, Dave “was moving from place to place and person to person” and was always searching for “home.” When he met Camilla and started working at Kids Company, things started to fall into place and he’s now been at the same job for 4+ years, feeling more at “home” than ever before, which has opened up the space for him to give more of himself.

And where has Dave left his relationship with his family today, many of us wondered? Not how most of us in the room would have anticipated given his childhood experiences. Dave says he’s forgiven his father a long time ago, but finds it difficult to forget what he went through. His parents are happily married 46 years later and he speaks to them on a daily basis.

When asked how he defines success in his day-to-day work with young people, Dave was reminded of this Emerson quote, which he feels sums it up best:

To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.

This is to have succeeded.

-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Looking ahead, Dave’s on a mission, unlike many people. Dave shared, “While a lot of unpleasant things happened to me in my life, I definitely remember the moments when I was the recipient of the kindness of others around me. I feel it’s so important, every act of kindness we do is so important, because you never know how it’s going to impact someone’s life down the line." And as he explores a future role in British politics, he says, “I want to bring love, caring and kindness to politics.” He continues, “You can have all the tools of success, but what it’s really about is creating communities. It's all about love.” And when asked if he sees himself as a leader, Dave humbly shares, “I’m not a leader. I’m a representative of a community that’s never had a voice before.”

Thank you Dave for sharing your personal journey with us and for choosing to be the change in your own life.

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The Story of iJourney's 100,000+ Audio Listens

Viral Mehta — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0700

In late 2006, we received an interesting email:

Just subscribed to your service. I have been writing and recording my own motivational content (messages-of-the-day in MP3 format) for two years to deliver daily using my own voice ... Any thoughts on using actual voice in your Quote-A-Day deliveries?

Turned out that the lady on the other end was Liz Helgesen, a nationally recognized voiceover artist who was offering the might of her voice and production company (Passion Fruit Productions) with just the intention to serve. We piloted it, and quickly saw the value it added to the experience of receiving the weekly iJourney Thought of the Week, and so Liz went to work. Week in and week out, she did quality recordings like Gentle Art of Blessing, I Will Not Die an Unlived Life, and The Theory Behind Forgiveness.

With CharityFocus projects, this is how it works: someone makes an offering of one of their gifts with nothing but the wish that it nurtures others on their journey. And then they work tirelessly. And before long, you see how far the ripples go. I just happened to see the number of audio downloads of these recordings, and it has crossed 100,000!

Much gratitude to Liz for giving her gift freely and repeatedly, and for walking together on this path of service!

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Seven Reflections From 30 Days of Meditation

Nipun Mehta — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 00:00:00 -0700

After sitting many 10-day Vipassana meditation courses, I got a chance to sit for a 30-day course last month. The same context of no reading, writing or talking but with more intensity and seriousness. How was my experience? What did I learn? In a way, there's a lot to say and in a way, there's not much to say. :)

Here are seven reflections that stand out ...

One: Meditation is a revolutionary experience. When you are sitting in silence, observing the arising and passing phenomena at the level of your body sensations, the tendency of the mind is to react -- I like this, I don't like this. It makes no sense to develop any attachment to things that are constantly changing but in ignorance, we repeatedly cultivate this pattern in trillions and trillions of moments. So, meditation goes against ALL the momentum. Just like Gandhi's satyagraha or birthing a new paradigm, one has to keep persevering with unflinching commitment and a compassionate gentleness.

Two, we have nothing to fear but fear itself. Perhaps the first few days were the hardest part of the course, for me. Somehow I was seriously tripped up by the heat. It was hot, the meditation cells had no fans, I was constantly sweating, electricity wasn't guaranteed, and water was only available for 90 minutes in the morning. On paper, these things shouldn't be a big deal, as I've lived in far more challenging circumstances. I knew that, but still, my mind started to panic. I would sit to meditate and start sweating profusely, the walls literally made me feel trapped, and it was hard to stay equanimous. Then, I would realize -- "This is day 3. You have 27 more to go." Yikes. What to do? You're crawling through the dirt of your inner-most basement, and it is simply impossible to back out. The only way out is through. And you don't know how long that'll be. You just have to breathe. And breathe again. Bit by bit, you release the fear, the walls start expanding, you stand up and even smile. :)

Three, the practice is to do-nothing. As Fukuoka would say, doing nothing is hard work. :) One has to let the mind unwind itself of its entanglements, naturally and without interference. If we don't run away from pain or indulge in pleasure, our mind becomes still and we start to see reality as it is. Because of our own past conditioning, though, we project our own hopes and dreams and fears and desires onto reality and convolute its perception. When we fight with reality, we always lose -- and subsequently suffer. After a while, we forget the cause of that suffering and even become addicted to that suffering. So, observing, ie. "doing nothing," becomes the difficult but fruitful process of allowing these delusions to unravel.

Four, grace happens. Along the way, of course, there are signs of encouragement. For the first ten days, we were to watch our natural breath. That's it. Breath coming in, coming out. Simple, painless task unless your ADD generation mind starts wandering every minute or two. It can be quite disheartening to see that you can't even be in the present for a little bit. One would imagine that there would be progress after dozens and dozens of hours of continuous practice, but no! Still, one keeps trying. On Day 7, I sat with the same heart of effort. A minute passed. Two minutes. I was still with my breath. Five. Ten. I couldn't believe it. There was no struggle and it felt almost effortless. Twenty minutes. Thirty, forty, fifty. And the whole hour passed and I was still there -- present. Really?!? I couldn't believe it myself. Surely, I must've had to have some help, but what, why? Speechless, :) and with renewed zeal, I carried on, knowing that I hadn't created this state, and that it wasn't going to operate on my terms.

Similarly, on Day 18, I came out of a focused meditation sit in my cell. On my way to get a drink of water, I noticed an old fellow hobbling with very short steps in front of me. During the course, your eyes are to be constantly downcast to minimize distractions, so I couldn't see what he looked like; yet I could see that he was carrying a giant jug in his left hand, presumably to fill it up and keep in his room so he didn't have to take frequent walks. Almost out of nowhere, I had this overwhelming thought -- "Oh, here is an old man, wanting to purify his mind. He doesn't have the strength to walk but he's still got the will to meditate. How noble! May he have access to ALL my assets. May his journey be strengthened." Just with that one thought, tears streamed from my eyes.

Five, the posse stays with you. Whether I'm in a meditation retreat or not, I often get a strong sense that there's a whole load of people with me. Physically, I may be alone but what I always carry is the inner transformation of all those small acts of service and resulting affinities with all those beings. It's a truly solid feeling. You're no longer meditating to purify *your* mind so *you* can be happier; you are cultivating because of the gifts of others and your merits are being cultivated for the benefit of others. It's really an indescribable feeling of gratitude.

Six, meditation culminates on the cushion, but germinates off the cushion. Sometimes retreatants get into this mindset of, "I need to sit more courses." While the ultimate show for Lebron James is on the basketball court, he wouldn't be Lebron if he didn't do cross training, off-court drills and off-peak exercises. Similarly, to be a solid meditator, you have to cultivate your strengths off the cushion. Just sitting alone isn't it. Buddha elegantly identified 10 paramitas (virtues) that really help -- practices like generosity, wholesome action, loving-kindness, truth, effort, and renunciation. Maybe you do an act of kindness and build your loving kindness, or work two jobs to support your grandparents and build your effort, or run a business with an impeccable code of ethics and build wholesome action. When I sat my first course after the walking pilgrimage with Guri, for example, I experienced a deep state of renunciation and subsequently had some profound sits on the cushion. In that sense, most of my off-the-cushion training happens via an instrument called CharityFocus and I remain grateful to all who keep it possible.

Seven, gratitude. I would imagine that it's impossible for anyone to spend extended time in solitude without feeling thankful for the inter-dependent parts of their existence. From my immediate family to the larger CharityFocus family to an even larger family of truth seekers, there is a long (and perhaps endless) list of things I feel grateful for. Many years ago, though, it was my brother who went to a 10-day meditation course -- which then inspired me to go, although he never insisted that I should go. :) I'm grateful to him for many reasons, but this is certainly one of them. And I'm grateful to Guri, with whom I was able to start meditating much more seriously. It was almost exactly five years ago, when Guri and I serendipitously stumbled into Igatpuri's meditation center and a seemingly random coin-toss :) kept us in town for three blessed months.

All in all, if I just had to say one-word, it simply would be: thank-you.

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Facing the Question of Money and Scale

Nipun Mehta — Sun, 09 May 2010 00:00:00 -0700

Money is a loaded topic. Some people are obssessed with it, others absolutely abhor it, and many flip-flop in their relationship to it. Furthermore, when you abstract that to an institutional level, the situation is even more intricate and intertwined with the question of scale.

If you let projects operate organically, sometimes they scale. If you let them scale, it becomes hard to avoid conventional currency (in the current state of our world). So what matters more -- being-organic or not-involving money? With Wednesdays, for example, we consciously keep them small; but if we were organic, we'd have a Church-sized hall by now. With Smile Cards, on the other hand, we favor organic -- so we let the project grow as wild as the ecosystem supports it. While CharityFocus operates within the constraint of not-soliciting money, it is still an interesting exercise to figure out the bounds of that value.

Perhaps motherhood is the most organic project of all. Most people don't have to search farther than their moms to find someone who has practiced kindness for a whole lifetime. But what if that kindness attracted more people, and now your mom had to care for 20 kids? Something would have to give. If a mom is genuinely loving, she will easily attract those neighborhood kids who think of her as a mom; so what is a mom to do? Stay small or increase the capacity to love? And what happens when you can't increase the capacity to love in proportion with the increase in the number of kids? There has to be suffering to face that question authentically, and most leaders shy away from that challenge -- either by "buying" that extra capacity or by shirking away from the responsibility. This fundamental psychological weakness, I would argue, is what has created situations like peak-oil, and is now threatening to repeat itself with our reckless use of technology.

Still, you have to act in that moment. A mom either has to refuse the neighborhood kids and be un-natural, or quickly find resources to build greater capacity and be un-principled, or hedge somewhere in between.

If you approach small-acts-of-kindness from a systems perspective, the same query poses itself in a different way. Birju, for example, wrote a paper in college where he argued (in part) that for someone to be gifting, someone else is paying the price and for this reason, you can't possibly have everyone be gifting. In many ways, that makes sense -- for people to be volunteering with CharityFocus, they are doing something elsewhere to cover their electricity bill. And even if the electricity company was giving me free electricity, they could do it only because they're making enough money off other customers. Of course, that argument assumes finite value -- it's an open question to see how the synergistic value of generosity (where the sum of the parts is greater than the whole) might change the equation. We know indigenous examples of how that might work, but given our current context (with roads/airports and non-local communities), its not easy to realistically imagine that possibility for the masses. So, then, do you still work towards that possibility with unflinching faith, or is it more skillful to compromise?

As a species, we probably need people, projects and experiments on all ends of the spectrum -- but each approach has its consequences. Which consequences are you called to accept? Without clarity on that question, we propagate our confusions. Some world leaders who think deeply about the power of "small" are often busy trying to scale their ideas; some grassroots activists talk about "small" only because they have no other choice.

There is another option, though, of not giving in to the seductive right-wrong duality. With that option, you simply choose struggle -- an incessant struggle with a set of conditions that will never be perfect. Struggle is perhaps an unappealing way to frame it, but it involves accepting a state without a definitive answer. At Karma Kitchen in Berkeley, for example, we do need to have at least $650 in donations every week for the experiment in generosity to continue; Works & Conversations does cost $5 per magazine to print, as does each Smile Deck. So it's a reality that money is involved in some way. However, instead of relying on the security of a grant, an investment or a pre-meditated fundraising scheme, gift-economy projects are supported by small contributions from the social capital of a community. It's trust. It's a struggle to trust like that, and to continue to choose that trust even when far easier options are available. Whenever CharityFocus has more money than we need, we give it away; we could have paid staff by simply including ads in each of the 50 million emails we send. CharityFocus encounters lots of opportunities to cash-in its goodwill, but it repeatedly chooses struggle, chooses to trust. As a result, we don't get the security and vertical growth of a typical organization -- we get freedom from the seduction of duality.

Then, it is no longer about whether you scale or not, use money or not. Those are real questions, but their answers are dynamically driven by the nuances of its imperfect context. The real issue is about acknowledging the struggle, staying with the struggle, and holding our collective struggle with a heart of compassion. The outcomes will be unpredictable, but the experience our interconnectedness is inevitable.

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The Compassion Union

Meghna Banker — Thu, 06 May 2010 00:00:00 -0700

This is the third installment of a series (see Thinking Big, Living Small and Nandan's Experiment with Shoes).

I will use questions from Mazarine's comment to my second piece as the stimulus for this piece: "I love the idea of growing horizontally, and living simply, but can you give us some clues about how you did that? Are you a cooperative now? Do your workers have a union? Are you organized differently?"

Growing horizontally: Thinking back, I feel our biggest concern was "branding" (it goes hand-in-hand with "trust"), not just within the organization but also outside. We were not able to completely rely on delegation of work to others. There was always this unknown sense of being responsible for everything that happened at the organization. Everything had to be under our control, because we thought we knew better. Measuring the steps that were taken, assuming the impact it would cause and producing a result that we thought would be most appropriate became our preoccupation. In short, we were working "only" from a pool of knowledge that we had and limiting it to that. A very dear friend puts it very well: "How can we trust what we know, when everything we know, depends so heavily on what we know". :)

If a volunteer came in, we would steer him/her in the direction of our work, not leaving them much room to try something new. If we did any collaborations with other companies or organizations, we made clear what our deliverables were and what theirs for us would be. e.g. We host the "I am the change film project" every year. Until 2008, it was all about the sponsors, media partners, newspaper partners, radio, television etc. And we always found ourselves telling them what we needed (from our limited knowledge) and what we can give in return. Again "interpreting knowledge from interpreted knowledge".

After our move to Ahmedabad, we saw how Manav Sadhna operated. From the outside, it looked like a very laid-back organization. People wondered "how are they able to do so much work when all we see is people laughing, having fun, chai (tea) and just enjoying?". However, if you dig deep, all the responsibilities are so well laid-out that they don't feel pressured at all. Whoever comes in is welcomed home. Volunteers who'd come in for an hour, day, weeks, months, are given a chance to observe what they (Manav Sadhna) do. Volunteers are then offered the opportunity to be a part of something that exists, or work on something that inspires them, or just enjoy being in the moment. The emphasis is on going with the flow. The results from this approach allowed the founders/volunteers/employees (empowerers) to grow.

They heard stories beyond their capacity of interpreted knowledge and were able to expand their experience by orders of magnitude. Inspite of the work being delegated, there was so much freedom and trust. And not being attached to the outcome made the whole process come alive. Every employee/volunteer is a head of their own designated project (process). Therefore, making each individual, an organization in itself. (Thinking Big, Living Small). This resulted in so many heartfelt experiences, stories, lessons to share and growing; a community of organizational soul-force (Growing Horizontally). It is a great truth that when we come from that space of freedom, then suddenly our perspectives change.

We followed just that. In 2009, in our living-small phase, we decided to scrap everything and go zero. No branding, no logos, no publicity for partnership, no give-and-take, no awards when all are winners and no designated employees. It was about going with the flow. Instead of taking help from the newspapers, we decided to go college to college, personally talk to students, friends and our online groups about this new approach and the new process of I am the change. Instead of having the competition once a year, we decided to have it on throughout the year and celebrate the participation by organizing a film festival to showcase ALL the films made, bringing the changemakers and filmmakers on one platform in an inter-transformational sharing. This step, however, cut down our application by at least 50%. Which was nice, because this time, it was more about growing a community of organizational soul-force.

After all the film submissions, we started working towards the Film Festival. We had no idea where we would start, but we knew we wanted to do this without fundraising, stay completely volunteer-run and keep it small (CharityFocus style). Little did we know after taking this jump, we were in for an even bigger surprise.

As the Alchemist says: "When a person really desires something, all the universe conspires to help that person realize his dream". One day, at Seva Cafe, Madhu (my husband) came across Murli, a student from Indian Institute of Management, Ahemdabad (IIM-A, India's most-coveted MBA school) had come there to volunteer. In conversations, Madhu mentioned our grassroot initiative of I am the Change Film Festival. He was so excited on hearing it that he immediately offered to help setup a collaboration with the Entreprenuership Cell at IIM-A to make this possible. The cell had a seminar called Dream Big India around the same time as our festival dates, and they offered to make I am the Change Festival a part of their festival.

It took us a long time to realize how difficult it is to even put up a flier in that university. And here we were offered whatever we wanted to make this possible. :) And so our journey began. The event was not only successful without branding, and without fundraising, but we had around 15 guest speakers from different walks of grassroot initiatives, almost 500+ visitors and approximately a total of 25 volunteers come in from Bangalore, Chennai, Mumbai, Baroda, Ahemdabad at their own expense.

How did they find out? - Word of mouth / Online social groups. Why did they come? They were inspired by the online stories, the changemakers and most importantly they felt that they could be of service. :)

The film project however is a small part of what we witness in our day-to-day life. The volunteers and co-workers come in with different ideas of what they feel can be utilized best with the media tools and we find ourselves immersing into new transformatory experiences through them.

Our fellow volunteers have no unions other than the compassion union and this is how we are organized!

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Arigato From Tokyo: Four Days of Unexpected Joy

Nipun Mehta — Tue, 04 May 2010 00:00:00 -0700

It is hard to imagine that four days ago, I only knew one person in Japan. And that too, I had met her once about a year ago. Today, after four action-packed days in Tokyo, more than half a dozen community talks to various groups, and scores of interactions with social change heroes, Japan feels like home.

Ultimately, a place can be called a home only when one finds family amongst its people. And I surely found family amongst the Saionjis.

It is rare to meet families like the Saionjis. About a year ago, I had met the youngest member of the family -- Yuka. Sensing the unmistakable joy in her presence, I figured that the "apple doesn't fall too far from the tree" but I had no idea how deep the roots of that tree actually could be.

Yuka's father, Hiroo Saionji, runs the Goi Peace Foundation. It aims to nurture a new paradigm rooted in four S's -- sustainability, systems, science, and spirituality. Reverance for life, respect for all differences, gratitude for nature and harmony of spirit and matter are their guiding principles. Apart from various regular events and publications, they host a major event every year where they honor international leaders working to further this new possibility. Two years ago, for example, Bill Gates attended to receive the award for his commitment to philanthropy; last year, Bruce Lipton was honored for his pioneering work to bridge science and spirituality.

Ironically, it was Goi Peace Foundation that first asked us to write an article in 2007. The resulting Tao of CharityFocus directly seeded so many possibilities for us, including our upcoming book, so I was only happy to have an opportunity to interact with them and share my gratitude.

After a translated presentation to the staff, I engaged in a private (and recorded) dialogue with Hiroo Saionji. The conversation felt so deeply satisfying, for both of us, that he spontaneously kept the translator and supporting staff for an extra hour. And even after that, a bunch of others huddled together to brainstorm further. Everyone already knew about CharityFocus, but they were keen to dive into details and replicate it in Japan.

At the time, I had no idea that Hiroo's great grandfather was the prime minister of Japan, or that he was a successful businessman. I discovered those details during our seven-course dinner, which featured some of the top diplomats of the country, famous artists like the conductor Tomomi Nishimoto, established entrepreneurs and even a beauty queen. He really wanted me to corrupt these minds :) with the gift-economy ideal, so there I was. It was, no doubt, a very tough setting for a CharityFocus kind of a talk, but lo and behold, generosity didn't disappoint. :) Sure enough, all these ambassadors got bit by the bug, started asking questions (although that wasn't part of the agenda) and the service vibe silently invaded the room. :) So much so that the Croatian ambassador even shared a haiku!

Rather fearlessly, Hiroo gave everyone the task of doing one small, anonymous act of kindness with a Smile Card. :) The Croatian ambassador was particularly touched and later asked for a private meeting, where he shared some incredible stories with people ranging from Princess Diana, Dalai Lama and Mother Teresa. Incidentally, he was the person who placed Mother Teresa in her casket and was the only politician allowed to make a speech at her funeral, because as Sister Fredericka said, "He was like a son to Mother Teresa." It's beautiful to see the kind of people that CF values attracts. :)

That was quite a welcome-to-Japan day. As it turned out, though, that was just the beginning.

The next day, I visited the Fuji sanctuary. As we entered the corner, in a gorgeous naturesque center at the foothills of the sacred Mt. Fuji, I saw several dozen people in suits and formal attire, enthusiastically waving at our car -- and some of them were holding a gigantic Smile Card print out! Perhaps it was about seeing a CF ripple in this remote area of Japan, perhaps it was the ambiance of the holy mountain, perhaps it was the joy of these people who I'd never met before -- I don't know what it was, but I experienced a profound feeling of joy and connection.

Maybe the prayer room was a source of that feeling. A huge room that was mostly empty, but filled with such density that you felt like you were moving through something. On the floor were huge (perhaps 100x200 feet or more) rolls of paper; on that paper were small squares, where people wrote a simple prayer -- May Peace Prevail on Earth. On the top periphery of the room were flags of all the countries in the world, with a translation of May Peace Prevail on Earth. Around the room were gigantic scrolls, one for each country in the world; whenever there is tension in a certain area in the world, people would focus their prayer for that region -- May Peace Prevail in Afghanistan, for instance. More than 30 million prayers have been written to date. I couldn't believe it! Who does that?!?

I wanted in, so I asked to write a prayer. First, I had to pick a language. When I selected Japanese, all the onlookers smiled big. :) After a few minutes of silence, as is their protocol, I wrote my first words of Japanese: May Peace Be in Japan; May their purpose be fulfilled. It was a beautiful experience.

Naturally, my community talk at Byakko hit a chord -- because these people were all about giving the most invisible, anonymous and subtle gift! At lunch, a fellow comes up and offered a gift -- an orange from his local farm. Someone gave me a piece of local art, another person gave me her favorite pen. My kind of people! Five people gave me a royal tour of the campus, although each of them only spoke a few words of English each. It was the cutest thing ever. We mostly laughed and hugged, because all of us knew that we were just listening to the space beneath the words. All the locals here have a deep respect for Mt. Fuji. They believe that it hosts many subtle beings, and a very important feminine deity that brings peace to the world. Due to the storms that morning, Mt. Fuji was all covered by thick clouds but coincidentally, the sun started to shine during my talk and as I reached the climax of my tour of the campus, Mt. Fuji was fully visible (pictured above) while thick clouds remained on the other side. My guides were quite elated by this and felt convinced that Mt. Fuji was blessing me. :)

All of that was stunning, but then, I learned of the prayer field. On this field, more than 12,000 people routinely come together -- in rain, wind and snow -- to do a humble prayer for world peace. Practically all of the world's religious leaders have been here to lead the prayers. Giant flags of every single country fly freely in the periphery. Who even knew that such a place existed?!?

That night, I had dinner with the woman who masterminded this -- Masami Saionji, Yuka's mother. After some rather intense spiritual experiences at an early age, she was spiritually mentored by Masahisa Goi (a close friend and contemporary of the founder of Aikido) and ultimately, brought forth this vision of bringing people together to pray for world peace. From her teenage years to her current age of 69, she has dedicated her life to this work and is known around the world. Immediately, you could tell that this was a woman of uncommon power. And what an honor it was to meet her, as she showered the CharityFocus work with many blessings! Among other things, she inscribed: "My dear beloved spiritual son, meeting you may be the happiest and joyful time of my life." Coming from her, that was something.

While being swept in the spiritual tour-de-force of the Saionjis, I was also meeting all kinds of interesting folks. People like Ikuma Saga, who started a rather remarkable (and very successful) alternative currency in Tokyo along with its first ever Farmers Market. And people like Kumi Fujisawa, who is a TV personality, think-tanker, and someone who runs the most popular social entrepreneurship forum in Japan (Sophia Bank). And people like Koji, whose daughter did the original translation of Smile Cards in Japanese (and who is now working on the Smile Deck translation).

Oh, and a person named Shin.

More than 15 years ago, our family met a Japanese man, who was seated next to us on a plane. Just during that airplane conversation, he had dramatically shifted both mine and Viral's world views. That was the only time we interacted with him, but when I was heading to Japan, I told Yuka that if there was ever a way to connect with this man, I would be overjoyed simply to express our long-held gratitude for our serendipitous connection. It was almost like telling someone, "Hey, I'm coming to India and I'd love to reconnect with this Indian guy I once met on a plane, 20 years ago." As serendipity would have it, though, Yuka attended a random film screening a week after my request and guess who was sitting in front of her?!? Shin. She recognized him from a photo and a chance meeting several years ago. It turns out that Shin was himself, quite busy, but sure enough, we met.

It wouldn't do justice to fit our interaction into a paragraph here. Shin is a physicist who healed himself of cancer, discovered all kinds of new capacities and is trying to support evidence based spirituality. When he does his annual meditation retreats, he doesn't eat anything and sleeps half an hour. He talks about love like none else; he shared a story of when he was in Mt. Shasta once, he raised both of his arms towards the sky and sent "love" to all beings -- and butterflies came and sat on each of his fingers. He even sent me the photo of that moment that his friends happened to capture. It's almost unreal. But here was this 74-year-old in front of me, and right as I shared few sentences of gratitude, he took out a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped the tears from his eyes. It was touching, and deeply satisfying. After our intimate two-hour conversation, he mentioned that all seven of his "chakras" were opened up. Although he's an extremely busy person, he kindly made it a point to attend my subsequent TedX-Tokyo talk. When I asked him if he had any advice for me, he smiled and simply said: "Trust your intuition."

Intuition is what took me to Japan. And I'm forever grateful. My usual plan is to give until people are confused with gratitude, and this time the universe made me receive, as I left Japan confused in gratitude. :)

Meister Eckhart once said, "If the only prayer you ever said was thank-you, it would be enough." In that sense, my one word Japanese vocabulary was just enough for my few last days in Japan. Arigato.

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Woman With a Bullet Next to Her Heart

Nipun Mehta — Fri, 30 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0700

Longtime CharityFocus friend, James O'dea, recently came out with his first book -- Creative Stress! It opens with a remarkable story that might be familiar to some of us ...

First, her words: "On 17th August 1973, whilst walking to work with a colleague, who was a member of the reserve police force, gunmen opened fire. We were going into our building of work, we were civil servants.

I was shot with a sub-machine gun, was taken to hospital, 14 miles away, where I had emergency surgery. The bullet had entered through the top of my left arm, broke ribs, split my lung and lodged between my heart and main artery. Surgery lasted over 6 hours and I had to have 20 pints of blood. I was in Intensive Care Unit where my consultant told my family 'that he left me comfortable to die'. I spent seven weeks in hospital, then discharged and was told to get on with my life."

You can imagine trying to pick up your life with a bullet literally lodged next to your heart. The sense of shock, trauma, grief and outrage must have been extremely intense. Nonetheless Frances decided to face all those conflicting emotions and with some trepidation she decided to go to a retreat with Towards Understanding and Healing. One of the women who was heading this work, who also became a friend and mentor to Frances, was Maureen Hetherington -- one of the great visionary activists for peace and reconciliation in Northern Ireland. Maureen, who is a friend and colleague, was pregnant when her husband Douggie was brutally shot on his first day of work for the Ulster Constabulary. Douggie had to have his arm amputated as a result.

It was not easy for Frances but she opened herself to healing, knowing that the opening would not only stir her wounds but provide fresh challenges. This exemplifies the handshake with stress. Nowadays, Frances is engaged in continued efforts to promote dialogue between Protestants and Catholics. She transformed a catastrophically negative experience -- a bullet which entered her body with the velocity of hatred -- and instead of living a quiet life in private peace and security, she chooses to live in the challenging fires of sectarian peacemaking. For her, the answer to her stress has been to nurture a more meaningful life…to summon up courage, to attempt to change the course of history and to face down oppression and intolerance. When we were together in London Derry a while back, I was stunned by her quiet demeanour and humility. There with the evidence of another's fierce aggression and hatred lodged next to her heart, she still chooses to find her own highest self. Without such creativity and commitment -- without such embodied virtue -- where do you suppose humanity would be headed?

Let's tell each other the stories of those who become our greatest teachers and templates of higher consciousness -- in their stories you will find that they not only shake the hand of stress, they dance with it.

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Is the Experience of Value a Decision or a Condition?

Neil Patel — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0700

[Somik 'defended' his inspiring and thought-provoking dissertation -- Achieving Clarity on Value -- at Stanford this week. Below is an interesting excerpt about meditation, included in his dissertation.]

When discussing the experience of value, we would be remiss if we did not touch upon an important philosophical question, namely, is the experience of value a condition or a decision?

Eastern psychology points to the latter as a deeper truth, and the former as an apparent truth. From the Vipassana technique of meditation, we find four key phenomena that explain the working of the mind: consciousness, perception, sensation and reaction. The first phenomena, consciousness, works "to cognize, simply to know, without differentiating. A sound comes into contact with the ear, and the (consciousness) notes only the fact that a sound has come." The second phenomena of the mind, perception, is about recognizing something from one's past experience as good or bad. For instance, a sound may consist of words of praise or words of abuse. The third phenomena of the mind, sensation, is what arises in response to the recognition. For something that was perceived to be pleasing, pleasant sensations arise throughout the body, and similarly for unpleasant perceptions, unpleasant sensations arise throughout the body. These sensations are felt by the mind. The fourth phenomena of the mind is to pull out the reaction from a database of past reactions to such sensations. At this point, the tendency of the mind is to apply the reaction, and deepen the habit-pattern as the applied reaction gets stored in the mind for future access. Moreover, the reaction creates more external stimulus and the cycle repeats, multiplying the perception and thereby the sensation. However, the teachers of meditation urge the student to discover a space between the reaction that arises as an informational element and the response that is a decision. Instead of reacting, the student is urged to stay equanimous, and develop equanimity as a habit. As the habit-conditioning changes immediately, the cycle breaks, and the physical experience also starts to change. Instead of multiplying and feeding on itself, the effect of external stimuli becomes short-lived, and the action taken is less and less a reaction and more and more a thoughtful action. In this sense, the experience of positive and negative stimuli becomes more of a decision.

This explanation helps us understand the experience of value in the moment, and if every moment may be dealt with equanimously, then the value experienced in the future is no longer a concern for analysis for one who lives in this way. It is a determination of the present moment. If everyone were to live in this way, we would not have to worry about our actions. However, as most of us have not trained enough to live in the moment, the experience of value is in large part influenced by conditions around us, and insofar as we desire to affect such conditions with our decisions, the need for thoughtful action remains.

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Following the Call of my Heart: Vinod Sreedhar

Nipun Mehta — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 00:00:00 -0700

You might remember Vinod from the media story titled -- Have You Got a Smile Card to Pass On? One thing after another, just last month, he shared a bit of his inspiring personal experiments, via an article in Bhoomi:

Since early 2008, my life has been a happy, ongoing experiment. Following the call of my heart, I completely stopped charging people for the services that I provide. My time, skills and experience are now offered freely to the world as a gift. And what stands out for me is this: worry is a totally misplaced emotion in the gift economy world. You are completely taken care of.

Each and every unconditional gift of my time has brought in a generous inflow of money, thoughtful gifts and a whole lot of heartwarming goodwill that just cannot be purchased for any amount. Events of the last two years have only reinforced my belief that giving always begets receiving, even if this receiving sometimes happens over a period of time and occasionally from people other than who you may have created value for. An anonymous gift of money, and not an insubstantial amount at that, has also found its way into my hands through friends.

More importantly, offering my time and experience as a gift to the world has allowed me to adopt completely new parameters to figure out just what I would like to work on. Since my time and knowledge are offered for free, money is no longer a part of the equation for me. Enjoying what I do or being able to learn from my work has become far more important to me.

I no longer feel limited to doing one or two activities that would normally define one’s 'profession'. My interests span many different activities including music composing, workshop design and facilitation, organizing learning visits across India, photography, writing and print design. Every one of these activities has now become an exciting medium for me to share my gifts with the world, while being supported completely. My work is now about who I am rather than about what I do.

Here's the full article:

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No Such Thing as an Inconsequential Act

Birju Pandya — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 01:00:00 -0700

At the Skoll World Forum last week, the keynote address was given by Paul Hawken, whose perspective on the human relationship to environment has shaped our culture. In this talk, he choose to focus on the value of small acts. He gave the example of an unknown person in South Africa who handed 'Civil Disobediance' to Gandhi, causing him to change his stance and indeed his life going forward. The point, as he put it, was that there was 'no such thing as an inconsequential act' - what's most important is to DO WORK PURELY and TRUST that authentically following the process of service will create the results that are necessary (even if we aren't the ones that receive credit for it).

As I reflected on that point, I thought of the intentional focus on small acts by CharityFocus. It is difficult sometimes to believe the immmeasurable RELEVANCE of something as simple as a smile, or a sharing story, or an hour spent volunteering. This is why the trust that Paul mentioned so resonated with me - to see the fruit of an action at a micro-level (the internal change that comes from small acts) and trust that such results scale to city, country, world. I am grateful for all the brothers and sisters who continue to put that intention into action.

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