HelpOthers.org: Anonymous Acts of Kindness

The Giving Tree

Thu, 02 Jul 2009 12:33:29 -0700

Many of you may have read Shel Silverstein's classic story "The Giving Tree" about a tree which gives everything of herself to a boy she loves. (If you haven't read it, please do and share it with a child!)

During my childhood, my mother's friend gave the book to me and my brother. Many years later, I discovered a card that accompanied the gift--it said "The tree reminds me of your mother". I was so touched by this that I taped the card to the inside of the book.

Over the years (like in the story) I have watched my mother give selflessly, to her kids, family, neighbors and friends. Even when she had a serious illness earlier this year, she continued with her volunteer work, cooking for sick friends, and walking for various causes. She does it all without any fuss and everyone knows they can always count on her--because she is always there.

As time goes by, I see her as "The Giving Tree" (like her friend wrote in the note so many years ago) and my aim in life is to be even half the "tree" that she is. I am blessed to have her and even though she doesn't live close by, we talk every day and I try to learn from her example.

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For Your Time, Effort And Smiles, Thank You!

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 13:00:45 -0700

Today I received my very own set of Smile Cards from HelpOthers.org. Yay! I opened my envelope with great excitement and found my promised ten cards along with a larger card with ideas printed on it. Immediately I started planning my next kind act – the cards truly have an inspiring effect!

It was then I realized the value of these cards and of websites such as HelpOthers.org. Not only does it inspire you, but receiving these cards, knowing that there are others out there with the same aim to be kind to others as I myself have, really made me smile! And that’s what it’s all about, isn’t it?

In other words, the Smile Cards have already done a great deal: they made me smile! And in the future I hope each and every single card I hand out will make someone else smile too.

I’d like to thank HelpOthers for offering these cards and for caring enough to encourage others – me included – to be generally kind and carry out random acts of kindness. I’d like to thank the volunteers who spend time and money on sending out these Smile Cards. And above all, I’d like to thank YOU for taking the time to read this and write on this website, thus encouraging others in the name of true kindness.

For your time, effort, and beautiful smiles, I thank you all!

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Smile Cards, Notes and Little Surprises

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 12:30:45 -0700

I have a little book of 'sticky notes' I purchased at a card shop at Christmas time, not sure who I would give the notes to or if I would use the individual funny notes at work. Well, I finally figured out how to use them.

I selected about 10 different notes, added my own little messages to them and placed them in envelopes w/ a smile card. One says how everything tastes better with hot fudge on it, so I will buy a jar of hot fudge to have ready to pass on to someone. One mentions a relaxing bubble bath so that will go with a nice bottle of bath bubbles. One jokes about popcorn so of course I will attach some microwave popcorn to the envelope. A couple envelopes have money in them for a treat which the sticky note mentions and so on.

On the backs of the envelopes I have penciled in what is inside or what should go with it so I can easily give them out when the occasion arises. On some envelopes I wrote things like, "If you found this, it's for you," or "Finder's keepers... this is yours."

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An Unexpected Welcome Home

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 11:33:05 -0700

We just got back from enjoying 10 wonderful days of our vacation in Idaho with our daughter Amy & son-in-law Mark and grandbabies Sarah & Gracie-cakes. Amy, last month had our 4th grand-daughter, Grace Eliza (better known in our family as Gracie-cakes).

We came home very late last night to find an area of our front yard under our large orange tree, planted in beautiful flowers and a handmade "Welcome Home" sign that after an almost 500-mile trek home was a welcome sight to see indeed.

Denise & I had one of our friends, Pat, make sure that our yard was watered and cared for while we were on vacation. Well, it appears that she or someone else (we still don't know who as of this writing) had taken upon themselves to plant several dozen flowers and liven up our front yard, and we were soooo happy that they did! It looks awesome.

This random act of kindness truly made our day and it makes me want to now begin my 30 Random Acts of Kindness over the next 30 Days now that we're home and settled. I've put together my list of friends that I believe will appreciate the little RAOK that we perform. Stay tuned!

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A Drop-In-The-Bucket Act

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 12:15:46 -0700

I was entitled to a free burger because I had 10 stamps on my Smart Alec's card. Awesome, I was pumped! I liked the burgers, was on a tight budget, and had enjoyed accumulating the stamps on my card (the cashiers had been very nice about it, providing extra stamps here and there : ). I was really going to saver this burger.

It suddenly dawned on me: the thing to do with this card was give it to someone who needed it more than I did. I plotted to leave the free burger card along with a smile card under someone's sleeping body on the street or something...it sounded like a good plan. But, as time went on and I did not find what seemed like the right opportunity, I went through a period of cashlessness and I thought maybe I will get myself a burger with this card. I deserve it.

On my way to claim my burger I had to override my inner inclinations that said giving it to someone else was what I really wanted to do with the card. I biked to Smart Alec's and as I got to the corner I passed a man sitting on the sidewalk with a cup in front of him. I walked by and locked up my bike. On the way back I made eye contact and said, "Hello."

He looked back at me and said, "Hello. Do you have any change to spare?" I went to kneel down next to him. "What do you need, brother?"

"Well...change...."

"For what? What do you need?"

"Well, I smoke....uh, I need food...."

And I jumped in there, "Great, why don't you come eat with me?"

"I don't have money...."

And I pulled out the free burger card and handed it to him: "Here's your meal ticket," I presented with a smile.

Bill (that's his name -- "my friends call me Wild Bill") and I went in, we each got a burger and sat down to eat together. The meal was somewhat awkward, somewhat enjoyable. I listened with delight and empathy to Bill's stories of getting back from Vietnam and his subsequent adventures in San Francisco in bars in hotels, in cabs, on the street. I observed my inner reactions as Bill removed the lettuce and tomato and pickle from his burger, and as he spoke about how there were "too many niggers in this town," while prefacing the comment with "now I'm not prejudice or anything but...." (if you're wondering: we saved the lettuce and such on a napkin, but ended up throwing it out anyway; I chose not to respond to the latter comment).

After the burgers I loitered outside with Bill as he smoked a cigarette and told me little anecdotes about the cops that drove by. When it came time to part ways he asked to "borrow" a couple of dollars, but I calmly told him I couldn't do that. I told him next time I would lend him my cell phone to call his sister back East. I waved to him as I rode my bike past him down the road.

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Since this incident, now a few weeks ago, I've come back to it again and again in my mind, trying to make sense of my feelings about it...memories of enjoying the moment, but combined with the bitter aftertaste of dissatisfaction, and of course the question so many of us come back to: in the end, what effect did I really have?

And then recently I heard this:

"You just do the best you can...to relieve suffering...because you realize that the suffering being is not separate from you."

That's what makes the most sense to me so far. Those kind of acts -- these "drop-in-the-bucket" acts --are not so much for the benefit of the helpee so much as the helper. Because in terms of what Bill really needed...not only was it beyond my means to supply, but I suspect the window of opportunity had long since passed. Is this pessimistic, cynical, condescending? I'm not sure. Are drop-in-the-bucket acts not worth it then? I don't think that's the case. As the prayer of St. Francis says: "it is in giving that we receive." The true service is to be permitted to serve....

Helping a Lost Dog Find Its Way Home

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 12:03:54 -0700

I saw a beautiful sunset today. It reminded me of a special favor I did not too long ago. I was driving home and noticed a small dog on the side of the road. Oddly, it just didn't seem to belong there. It was a busy route and an 18 wheeler was coming.

I stopped the car and dotted across the street. The little mutt looked at me and came right over. He had a collar around his neck but no name, nothing. There was nothing but woods on this road, but about 6 homes on the other. So, I put pooch in the car and drove up one of the long driveways.

I knocked on one door and asked, "Do you have a dog?" The lady who opened the door said no, so I showed her the dog and asked if she had an idea whose dog it could be. She immediately recognized it as the dog from four houses down. I thanked her and went over. The owner was outside looking for the dog when I pulled up the driveway. She was so happy to see her dog, knowing how dangerous the road is. Well, I missed the sunset that day, but today's was really cool.

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An Unforgettable Breakfast at McDonalds

Sun, 28 Jun 2009 17:48:39 -0700

This was a story I wanted to share with you, from a woman who helps the homeless.

I am a mother of three and have recently completed my college degree. The last class I had to take was Sociology. The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human being had been graced with. Her last project of the term was called, 'Smile.' The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions. I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway. So, I thought this would be a piece of cake.

Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son, and I went out to McDonald's one crisp March morning. It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son. We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away including my husband. I did not move an inch, while an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside of me as I turned to see why they had moved.

As I turned around I smelled a horrible body odour and saw two poor homeless men standing behind me. As I looked at the short gentleman closest to me, he was 'smiling'. His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of hope as he searched for acceptance. He said, "Good day," as he counted the few coins he had been clutching. The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyed gentleman was his salvation.

I held my tears as I stood there with them. The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted. He said, "Coffee is all Miss," because that was all they could afford. After all, if they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something and they just wanted to be warm.

Then I really felt it - the compulsion was so great I almost reached out and embraced the little man with the blue eyes. That is when I noticed all eyes in the restaurant were set on me, judging my every action. I smiled and asked the young lady behind the counter to give me two more breakfast meals on a separate tray. I then walked around the corner to the table that the men had chosen as a resting spot.

I put the tray on the table and laid my hand on the blue-eyed gentleman's cold hand. He looked up at me, with tears in his eyes, and said, "Thank you." I leaned over and patted his hand. I started to cry as I walked away to join my husband and son. When I sat
down my husband smiled at me and said, "That is why you are part of my life honey, to give me hope." We held hands for a moment and at that time, we knew that because of the good fortune that we had been given were we able to give.

I returned to college, on the last evening of class with this story in hand. I turned in 'my project' and the instructor read it. Then she looked up at me and said, "Can I share this?" I slowly nodded as she got the attention of the class. She began to read and that is when I knew that we as human beings share this need to heal people and to be healed.

In my own way I had touched the people at McDonald's, my son, instructor and every soul that heard the story in the classroom on the last night I spent as a college student. But, I graduated with one of the biggest lessons I would ever learn....